20 Questions About the NHL Playoff Pools

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A few years ago, they released an electronic version of the classic road trip game 20 Questions. I scoffed at the idea that I could be beaten by a simple computer. Then it only took five questions for the device to guess I was thinking of a spatula and I realized it was only a matter of time before the machines took over. I, for one, welcome our new IT overlords and, in honor of our future robotic leaders, we will use the 20 questions to examine strategy in the NHL playoff pools.

What is the difference between a regular season and a playoff pool?

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A lot. You really choose teams rather than players. A third line on a finals team is worth more than a stud on a team that gets bounced in the first round.

Should I stock up on players on a few teams or spread out my picks?

Each strategy has its merits. Just don’t pick which players will face each other in the first round. Much like mixing Meatloaf and Gary Busey, it’s a recipe for disaster.

Should I stock up on Canucks?

I will.

So you’re not worried about the Blackhawks?

No way. It’s not like they’re the reigning Cup champions or anything with a strange psychological hold on our goalie (he’s sweating profusely).

Do you need a towel or something?

Next question.

Assuming it’s at a deep discount, would it be outrageous to draft Hawks?

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The Canucks fan in me gives a disapproving look, but the rational side thinks it’s clever, especially when it’s a crazy deal.

Who would you take first overall?

Honestly, I do not know.

Not Daniel? Sacrilege.

The Sedins are first-rounders, but their game isn’t exactly cut out for the playoffs. I would almost prefer Kesler. Or even Perry. Ovechkin is also tempting.

But is Luongo the highest rated goalkeeper?

In the West yes, but you have to love Thomas for Beantown in the East. Vezina candidates like Rinne, Price and Lundqvist are studs, but their teams aren’t expected to go far.

So you don’t think Montreal, Nashville or New York will advance to the second round?

No. I have all the best seeds going. Boring.

Is Stamkos a first rounder?

Let’s see, a 21-year-old playoff rookie who has five goals in his last 28 games against a stingy Pens team….

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So you like pens?

Without their cleats, they score by committee from the start, and I like Letang and Fleury in theory, but I think they’ll fall after eliminating Tampa. If only you could recruit coaches, Bylsma would be a top pick.

Is Chara the first D-man to leave the set?

Unless someone makes a home run pick and grabs Ehrhoff, Big Z is the best option at backfield. Then Lidström. Then Pronger.

Isn’t Philly’s atrocious play until the end a reason to avoid recruiting the Flyers?

Yes and no. Briere led the NHL in scoring in the playoffs last year and Pronger is a beast, but I wouldn’t go near their goalies.

Is this the year San Jose shakes its reputation?

The Sharks go unnoticed even though they are the hottest team in hockey and are expected to fly over Los Angeles. However, he still wouldn’t recruit Joe Thornton.

Which players could make the difference in the playoffs?

I like Lucic. Leino and Laich will outperform. I also like the Ducks in the later rounds.

Players to avoid?

Pure finesse guys like Gaborik tend to fade in the playoffs, but I just avoid the Rangers. I don’t like a stoned Zetterberg either. Or Joe Thornton.

How many questions is that?

Counting that. Eighteen. Better make those last two good.

Animal, plant or mineral?

None of those.

Is it a spatula?

Damn it.

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